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    October 26

    片段描写——鞋子

    人来人往的中越边境车站里,吵杂叫卖声连成一片,到处是三五一堆,四五一群的人。有忙着排队买票的,有胡乱攀谈的,也有顺便抽出闲空挑选纪念品的,热闹非凡。

             突然间,一股夹杂着阴湿的气味朝人群的这边飘来,随着气味的越来越强烈,只见一个身着破烂,左肩上扛着一个破烂口袋中年男人拖着微微有点跛的右脚朝人群这边走来。正在攀谈,挑选东西的人们都触电似的顺势给他让个道,生怕离他近了自己身上也会沾染到这股奇怪的味儿。

            中年男人上身穿着七八十年代时很流行的中山服,可惜要很仔细看才能辨别出,料子已经洗废了,上面的扣子也是东拼西凑来的,只钉了中间的四颗。下身穿着一条 灰白色的短裤,上面还有五六滴油渍,用一根黑色旧布条把裤子紧紧的勒在了腰间。脚上的那双鞋最是醒目,颜色看似棕色,上面因磨损造成的纹路很是 清晰,很多染成棕色的外皮已经脱落了。两只鞋子的鞋带不太一致,左边的那只鞋带要稍微粗些,颜色也要深些,应该也像衣服扣那样是拼凑而成的 。细细的打量,左脚的那只鞋外面边的缝合处也已经开胶了,有一厘米那么长,隐隐约约的能看见他那穿在里面的光脚。鞋尖处被被顶得紧紧的并且满满的,隔着鞋子能清晰的看到男人大拇指的整个轮廓,被挤压的大拇指感觉就要呼之欲出了。男人向前走着。鞋的后跟处已经被踩塌了,尽管男人把踩塌处掰正以便好包裹好自己的脚后跟,但被踩下去的皮的纹路依然可见并且固执的朝下撅着。男人走近了,这才发现他的右鞋鞋跟底要比左鞋厚大约一厘米,那厚出的一厘米 是用其他材质的轮胎皮钉上去的。这样是做大概是为了把有点跛的右腿垫高点,让右腿离地近点缩短两腿之间的落差,好让跛脚的男人走起路来没那么的一摇一晃吧。

            男人越走越远了 ,味道也跟着越来越远了,人群又随即聚拢,好似之前一般。

             

    ps:何大草老师布置的关于鞋子特写的描写文字。觉得写得不好,所以先说写好给歪

     

    歪同学看的,我也没脸给人家看了。老师指出的缺点是主角鞋子出场太迟,烘托文字多

     

    了,对于常规性的突破不够。下午因为要迟到了,穿着至少六厘米的高跟鞋狂奔去教学

     

    楼,结果还是迟到了五分钟,被老师点来第一个点评。不过还好,大草老师的课是我觉得

     

    少数的有听头的课之一,整个人还是挺乐的。

     

            呵呵,谢谢小鸵鸵带的栗子,小耳朵再亲你一下哈~~

    Comments (3)

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    鸵 鸵wrote:
    好嘛好嘛 亲一个~
    Oct. 28
    籽 童wrote:
    要的嘛,今天传媒老师还布置了要写符号学方面的作文,选一符号切入谈其背后的文化内涵……
    Oct. 27
    Melodie 霞wrote:
    主角出场慢了……语言还要老练些有点像高中作文……好的方面嘛,还是不说了,期待小耳朵同学下一篇更精彩
    Oct. 26

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